Coming Home Carer Skills
Module 7: Privacy and dignity
Topics follow the 16 Care Certificate standards (2025). This module maps to standard 7, "Privacy and dignity".
Coming Home Carer Skills is our own free course for family carers. Its topics follow the 16 Care Certificate standards (2025) from Skills for Care, NHS England and Skills for Health. It is not the Care Certificate, it is not a qualification, and those organisations have not endorsed it.
This guide to Privacy and dignity is correct at October 2026. We've written it in good faith as general information to help family carers. It isn't legal, financial or medical advice, and it can't teach practical skills such as moving someone or first aid. For those, ask the person's nurse or therapist, or find an in-person course. To the extent the law allows, we can't accept liability for any errors or omissions, or for decisions made on the strength of this guide. In a medical emergency call 999. If you need advice quickly, call NHS 111. In Northern Ireland, contact your GP out of hours service.
Read the video transcript
Module 7: Privacy and dignity. Video transcript
Full narration with what is on screen, for learners who prefer to read or cannot hear the video.
[00:00] Module 7: Privacy and dignity
On screen: Coming Home Carer Skills; About 5 minutes. Picture: Sunita and Mahesh sit at a small kitchen table with cups of tea, a radio between them. Mahesh is telling a story with one hand raised; Sunita laughs.
Welcome to Module 7 of Coming Home Carer Skills: Privacy and dignity. On screen are Sunita and her dad, Mahesh, at home in Cardiff. Mahesh is 84. His hands shake, so buttons and shaving take him longer. He loves the cricket on the radio. We will look at what dignity means, personal care, personal space, doing things for yourself, and keeping things private.
[00:29] Before we start
On screen: Our own free course for family carers.; Topics follow the 16 Care Certificate standards (2025).; Not the Care Certificate. Not a qualification.; Not endorsed by Skills for Care, NHS England or Skills for Health..
First, a short note. Coming Home Carer Skills is our own free course for family carers. Its topics follow the 16 Care Certificate standards (2025) from Skills for Care, NHS England and Skills for Health. It is not the Care Certificate, it is not a qualification, and those organisations have not endorsed it.
[00:54] In this module
On screen: What dignity means at home; Personal care with dignity; Personal space and belongings; Doing things for themselves; Keeping things private.
By the end, you should know some simple ways to help with care while the person keeps their dignity and privacy.
[01:02] "A parcel, not a person"
On screen: No knock.; Buttons done for him.; His news shared without asking.. Picture: Sunita stands outside Mahesh's closed bedroom door, holding a folded towel, about to knock. She looks thoughtful.
When Mahesh came home from hospital, Sunita wanted to help with everything, fast. She walked into his room without knocking. She did up his buttons to save time. She told a neighbour all about his hospital stay. One day Mahesh said, "I feel like a parcel, not a person." Sunita was upset. But they talked, and they changed some things together.
[01:28] What dignity means
On screen: See the whole person.; Use the name they like.; Talk to them, not about them.; Let them choose.. Picture: Joy, a paid carer, sits with Mahesh at the table, listening while he tells her a story and shows her an old cricket photo (simple shapes, no readable faces).
Dignity means being seen as a whole person, with your own history, likes and opinions. Needing help does not change that. Use the name they like. Talk to them, not about them. Let them choose their clothes, food and routine, and help them look the way they like. Ask about any customs that matter to them, for example about washing, modesty or prayer.
[01:55] Knock and wait. Ask first.
On screen: Knock, and wait for an answer.; "Would you like a hand?"; If they say no, step back.. Picture: Mahesh, dressed, sits on the edge of his bed and smiles, doing up the top button of his cardigan himself. Sunita stands in the open doorway, waiting, smiling.
Now, Sunita knocks on her dad's door and waits for an answer, even though it is her home too. Before she helps, she asks. "Would you like a hand with your cardigan?" Some days Mahesh says yes. Some days he says, "I'll do it." Then she steps back. Ask before you move their things, open their post, or look in their drawers or phone.
[02:21] Personal care with dignity
On screen: Ask how they like it done.; Warm room. Things ready.; Door closed. Keep them covered.; Explain each step.. Picture: At the open bathroom door, Joy hands Mahesh a warm, folded towel. Mahesh wears a buttoned dressing gown and smiles. No washing is shown.
Help with washing, dressing or the toilet can feel very personal, especially from family. Ask how the person likes things done, and keep to their routine. Warm the room, and get towels and clothes ready first, so you do not need to leave halfway. Close the door and curtains. Keep them covered, with a towel over any part you are not helping with. Say what you are about to do, and ask before you touch. This module does not teach how to wash or move someone. An occupational therapist can suggest equipment like grab rails or a shower seat. Ask the council, or in Northern Ireland, the Health and Social Care Trust.
[03:06] Doing things for themselves
On screen: Lay clothes out in order.; Break tasks into steps.; Give plenty of time.; Do not take over.. Picture: Anjali, in her wheelchair, plaits her own long hair in front of a mirror at a low dressing table. Ravi sits nearby with a cup of tea, waiting and smiling.
Doing too much for someone can take away their confidence and skills. Anjali uses a wheelchair. She likes to do her own hair. Her husband Ravi puts the brush and mirror within reach, then waits. Small steps help. Lay clothes out in the order they go on. Break tasks into steps. Give plenty of time, and try not to take over.
[03:32] Their room, their way
On screen: Ask before you tidy or move things.; Their room, their choice.; Time alone matters.. Picture: Ciara knocks on Declan's open bedroom door, pointing to a pile of washing in her arms as if asking. Declan, sitting on his bed with a pack of cards, gives a thumbs up.
In Northern Ireland, Ciara shares a home with her brother Declan. Declan's room is full of football things and card games. Ciara asks before she tidies, and leaves things where he keeps them. Everyone needs some time alone, and privacy for phone calls and visitors.
[03:52] Keeping things private
On screen: Ask before you share.; Agree what to say.; Ask before photos.; Tell the GP practice what they agree to.. Picture: Sunita chats with a smiling neighbour over a low front garden wall, a shopping bag in her hand.
Back in Cardiff, a neighbour asks about Mahesh. This time, Sunita says, "He's getting stronger, thanks." They agreed that answer together. His health and money belong to him. Ask before you share, and ask before you take or post photos. In England, Scotland and Northern Ireland, health staff usually need the person's agreement before they share information with a carer. In Wales, NHS staff must keep it confidential too. Ask the person, and let the GP practice know.
[04:28] When to get help
On screen: New redness or soreness on the skin: tell the GP, community nurse or care team soon.; On black or brown skin, it may look purple or blue.; If you need advice quickly, call NHS 111. In Northern Ireland, contact your GP out of hours service.; In an emergency, call 999..
While you help, you may see new redness or soreness on the skin. On black or brown skin, it may look purple or blue. Tell the GP, community nurse or care team soon. If you are worried about someone's health, contact their GP. If you need advice quickly, call NHS 111. In Northern Ireland, contact your GP out of hours service. In an emergency, call 999.
[04:59] Get help
On screen: Your council: occupational therapy and equipment; Northern Ireland: your Health and Social Care Trust; The GP practice and community nurse; Carers UK helpline: 0808 808 7777 (free).
For equipment and ideas, ask your council for an occupational therapy assessment. In Northern Ireland, ask your Health and Social Care Trust. The GP practice can help with skin changes or bladder problems. You can also ask the GP practice about a district or community nurse. For advice about caring, Carers UK runs a free helpline on 0808 808 7777.
[05:28] To sum up
On screen: See the whole person.; Knock, ask, explain.; Let them do what they can.; Keep their private things private.; Next: read the pages, then try the quiz.. Picture: Mahesh, cardigan neatly buttoned, laughs with Sunita over tea in the front room; the cricket is on the radio.
To sum up. See the whole person, not just the help they need. Knock and wait. Ask before you help, and explain what you are doing. Let them do as much as they can, and keep their private things private. Mahesh still needs help some days. But now he says he feels like himself again. Now read the pages below, then try the quiz. You can take it as many times as you like.
Page 1: What dignity means at home
Dignity means being seen as a whole person. The person you care for has their own history, likes, habits and opinions. Needing help does not change that.
A story. When Mahesh came home from hospital, his daughter Sunita wanted to help with everything. She walked into his room without knocking. She did up his buttons to save time. She told a neighbour all about his hospital stay. One day Mahesh said, "I feel like a parcel, not a person." Sunita was upset, but they talked, and they changed things together.
Small things that make a big difference.
- Use the name they like. Ask if you are not sure.
- Talk to them, not about them, even when other people are there.
- Ask for their opinion, and listen to the answer.
- Let them choose: clothes, food, what to do, and when.
- Help them look the way they like. Hair, shaving, make-up, jewellery and clothes can matter a lot.
- Ask about any customs that matter to them, for example about washing, modesty, food or prayer.
Talk about it. If you are not sure what someone would like, ask. If something you do upsets them, say sorry and try another way. Caring is new for many families, and it is fine to learn together.
Sources (read 8 Oct 2026): NHS website, "How to help someone you care for keep clean" (dignity, ask how they would like to be helped), https://www.nhs.uk/social-care-and-support/practical-tips-if-you-care-for-someone/how-to-help-someone-you-care-for-keep-clean/ ; Stroke Association, "Top tips for family and friends", https://www.stroke.org.uk/stroke/life-after/top-tips-family-and-friends ; Alzheimer's Society, "Washing, bathing and showering tips" (ask how they like to wear a head covering; respect their preferences), https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/living-with-dementia/washing-bathing-showering-tips
Page 2: Personal care with dignity
Personal care means help with things like washing, dressing, shaving and using the toilet. Many people find it hard to need this help, especially from family. This page is about doing it with respect. It does not teach how to wash or move someone.
Before you start.
- Ask the person how they would like to be helped. Ask what they want to do themselves.
- Keep to their routine, if you can. Bath or shower? Morning or evening? Which soap or shaving cream?
- Get everything ready first: towels, clothes and toiletries. Then you will not need to leave them halfway through.
- Make sure the room is warm.
While you help.
- Close the door and the curtains or blinds.
- Say what you are about to do, one step at a time. Ask before you touch.
- Keep them covered. Only uncover the part being washed, and keep a towel over the rest.
- Let them do as much as they can, even if it takes longer.
- Keep calm and kind. Feeling a bit embarrassed is natural, for both of you.
If they say no. Do not force it. Ask why, and try again later, or another way.
Look out for skin changes. While you help, you may see new redness or soreness on the skin, often over bony areas like the heels, elbows, hips and tailbone. On black or brown skin, it may look purple or blue instead. Tell the GP, community nurse or care team soon. The NHS page "Pressure ulcers" explains more. It says pressure or rubbing can damage the skin and the tissue underneath, often when someone has trouble moving. If the skin is also hot or swollen, or there is pus, a high temperature or pain that is getting worse, contact the GP the same day. If you need advice quickly, call NHS 111. In Northern Ireland, contact your GP out of hours service.
Get help. The council can arrange a free assessment by an occupational therapist (OT) in England. OTs can suggest equipment, like grab rails, a raised toilet seat or a shower seat. In Wales and Scotland, ask the council. In Northern Ireland, ask your local Health and Social Care Trust. For problems with bladder or bowel control, talk to the GP.
Sources (read 8 Oct 2026): NHS website, "How to help someone you care for keep clean", https://www.nhs.uk/social-care-and-support/practical-tips-if-you-care-for-someone/how-to-help-someone-you-care-for-keep-clean/ ; Alzheimer's Society, "Washing, bathing and showering tips", https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/living-with-dementia/washing-bathing-showering-tips ; NHS website, "Pressure ulcers", https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pressure-sores/ ; NHS website, "Home adaptations", https://www.nhs.uk/social-care-and-support/care-services-equipment-and-care-homes/home-adaptations/ ; GOV.WALES, https://www.gov.wales/adapt-your-home-if-you-are-disabled-or-older-person/how-apply ; mygov.scot, https://www.mygov.scot/care-equipment-adapt-home/how-to-apply ; nidirect, https://www.nidirect.gov.uk/articles/adapting-your-home
Page 3: Personal space and belongings
Everyone needs some space that is their own. This matters even more when someone needs help with daily life.
Knock and wait. Knock before you go into their room or the bathroom, and wait for an answer. Do this even in your own home, and even if the door is open.
Their things are theirs.
- Ask before you move, tidy or throw away their things.
- Ask before you open their post, or look in their bag, drawers or phone.
- Put things back where they keep them. This matters even more for someone with sight loss or memory problems.
Their room, their way. Let them choose how their room looks: photos, furniture, where things go. If changes are needed, for example to make space for equipment, plan them together.
Time alone. Most people need some time on their own. Give them privacy for phone calls and visitors, if they want it.
When things need to change. Sometimes a bed has to move downstairs, or someone else has to come in to help. Explain why, and ask what would make it feel more like their own space.
Sources (read 8 Oct 2026): NHS website, "How to help someone you care for keep clean" (privacy and dignity), https://www.nhs.uk/social-care-and-support/practical-tips-if-you-care-for-someone/how-to-help-someone-you-care-for-keep-clean/ ; RNIB, "Sight loss: helping you to help others" (ask before moving things), https://www.rnib.org.uk/get-involved/volunteer/helping-you-help-others/
Page 4: Doing things for themselves
When you love someone, it is natural to want to do things for them. But doing too much can take away their confidence and skills. Doing things for themselves, even small things, helps people feel in charge of their own life.
Ask, then help. Ask "Would you like a hand?" and wait for the answer. If they say no, step back.
Small steps that help.
- Lay clothes out in the order they go on.
- Break a task into small steps. They do some, and you do some.
- Give plenty of time. Try not to rush them, or take over.
- Sit down to dress or shave, if standing is tiring.
- Clothes with big buttons, zips or elastic waists can be easier.
- Praise the effort, without fuss.
Ask about equipment. An occupational therapist can suggest gadgets and new ways to do things. In England, Wales and Scotland, ask the council. In Northern Ireland, ask your local Health and Social Care Trust.
Choices and capacity. People have the right to make their own choices, even ones you would not make. Module 5 explains more about choice and mental capacity.
Sources (read 8 Oct 2026): Stroke Association, "Top tips for family and friends" (do not do everything for me; lay out clothes), https://www.stroke.org.uk/stroke/life-after/top-tips-family-and-friends ; NHS website, "How to help someone you care for keep clean" (help them stay independent), https://www.nhs.uk/social-care-and-support/practical-tips-if-you-care-for-someone/how-to-help-someone-you-care-for-keep-clean/ ; Alzheimer's Society, "Washing, bathing and showering tips" (lay out clothes; break it into steps), https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/living-with-dementia/washing-bathing-showering-tips
Page 5: Keeping things private
Caring means you learn a lot about someone: their health, money, family and feelings. These details belong to them.
Ask before you share. Before you tell family, friends or neighbours about the person's health or other private matters, ask them what they are happy for you to say.
- Agree a simple answer for people who ask. For example: "He's getting stronger, thanks."
- Ask before you take or share photos of them, especially online, or when they are unwell or in bed.
- Keep letters, notes and passwords somewhere safe.
Talking with health staff. Doctors and nurses keep the person's information private. In England, Scotland and Northern Ireland, health staff usually need the person's agreement before they share it with a carer. In Wales, NHS staff must also keep people's information confidential. Ask the person if they are happy for you to be told things, and let the GP practice know. Having power of attorney does not always mean you can see health records, so ask the GP practice what they need.
What the law says. The UK GDPR and the Data Protection Act 2018 apply across the UK. They set rules for organisations that hold people's information. Notes a family member keeps at home, just for household use, are not covered by these rules. They are still private, so look after them well.
Copies of records. The person can ask an organisation, such as their GP practice, for a copy of the information it holds about them. You can ask for them if you have their written permission, or the right power of attorney.
If you are worried someone is being harmed, Module 10 explains who to talk to. If someone is in danger now, call 999. Module 14 says more about handling information and records.
Sources (read 8 Oct 2026): Data Protection Act 2018, section 214 (extent: the whole UK), https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2018/12/section/214 ; ICO, data protection exemptions (domestic purposes), https://ico.org.uk/for-organisations/uk-gdpr-guidance-and-resources/exemptions/a-guide-to-the-data-protection-exemptions/ ; ICO, getting copies of your information, https://ico.org.uk/for-the-public/getting-copies-of-your-information-subject-access-request/ ; NHS England Digital, sharing information with unpaid carers, https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/information-governance/guidance/sharing-information-with-unpaid-carers ; NHS inform, information for carers using NHS services, https://www.nhsinform.scot/care-support-and-rights/health-rights/communication-and-consent/information-for-carers-using-nhs-services/ ; nidirect, accessing medical or health and social care records, https://www.nidirect.gov.uk/articles/accessing-medical-or-health-and-social-care-records ; Wales: Digital Health and Care Wales, Code of Practice for Health and Social Care in Wales (paragraph 13, confidentiality), https://dhcw.nhs.wales/ig/ig-documents/ig-framework/codeofpractice-pdf/
The printable guide
29 pages, A4. Questions to write in, with answers at the back.